i've always been a fan of change, for the most part. it's exciting, it's new- and in most cases, you might as well just embrace it because it's coming if you like it or not. but with change, and especially BIG change, comes growing pains. and however much you embrace the change, it still tends to hurt a bit.
clara and i have been going through some changes. at first, i was really struggling with those growing pains. learning that she needed new things from me, and i needed different things from her. a lot of things changed in a short amount of time. we were breast feeding less often, she was needing more substantial meals, she started teething, she learned to crawl, she was learning her boundaries etc etc etc. while this was all very exciting i found myself stressing out about it, focusing on the growing pains, if you will, a little too much. instead of enjoying all the new fun that these changes were bringing in.
like the emergence of this big personality inside my little jelly bean. the newfound love for stuffed animals and books and lullabies. learning to play (and almost say) peek-a-boo. laughing with her dimpled hand over her mouth. making cheese faces- scrunched up nose, bared gums and all. i think i was wanting to hang onto the days of not having to tell my child "no" and solely comforting and meeting needs. but i'm here to say that although I still do comfort and meet needs, that is not all i do for her anymore and i'm ok with it. teaching her that eating the dirt out of the potted plants is just not in the cards for her is now added to my resume. i may just be out of the growing pains. we're back into a good routine again. oh how i thrive on a good routine. it feels good.